I sent this out in an email last night.
(This is a bit long. It is some thoughts on Jordan over the last couple of weeks. For those who did not know, I came back to Amman in early October to continue studying Arabic.)
What I wrote in the days immediately following the bombings at 3 hotels in Amman:
"Where were you 11-9" has become the new "Where were you September 11?" It's only natural, but it is still very surreal, since it was so close to home this time.
At the time of the explosions, I was hanging out with new friends at my old hotel downtown. Two journalists had recently come back from Iraq, and were telling stories of what had been going on there the last few weeks. One of them got a phone call about an explosion at the Radisson SAS, and the weary journalists went out to see what was happening. It took about 10 minutes for the news to show up on Al-Jazeera, and then came news of the other explosions. Lots of frantic texting and phone calls ensued.
In 2001 I was living in Northampton, Massachusetts, very far away from New York City and Washington, DC. Now I am living in Amman, in Jebel Amman, near the first circle. The Hyatt hotel is near the 3rd circle, and the Radisson SAS a little ways beyond. The Days Inn hotel is in a different part of town, altogether. I have not yet been to the Radisson, though I hear they have a good Happy Hour I keep meaning to check out. I had been inside the Hyatt a couple of times, and sat in the lobby where the bombing happened. Seeing the images on the BBC and al-Jazeera the other night, it was really weird to see the places I had been, and knowing they were broadcast all around the world.
The day after I didn't go outside most of the day. I didn't get much sleep the night before and was just pretty glued to the TV all day. When I finally went out in the evening (to respond to 'are you alive' emails), things were noticeably different. Cars were decked out with flags, and all the music stores were playing patriotic songs about the WATAN (homeland (. I am starting to get more used to hearing bag pipes in the Middle East.
On Friday night I went out in a nice part of town. On a normal Friday you would need to make a reservation because places are so popular. This Friday night the city was quiet inside, but outside there was action. Cars were draped in giant Jordanian flags and pictures of the King. They drove in caravans, with people hanging out of car windows and sunroofs, waving flags and yelling. It was like a big party going on.
In the days following September 11, I didn't understand the upsurge of American pride. People buying flags and putting them on their cars and lawns seemed very artificial to me. But for some reason being here I can understand the people's pride. I thought of buying a flag to hang from my balcony, but in the end decided against it. At first I was a little nervous about walking in my neighborhood because there aren't many foreigners. I was afraid people would blame me for what happened and harass me, because I am clearly from the West. But things were fine. I guess it is true: Kulna al-Urdon – We are all Jordan. (see picture below)
Sunday was a national holiday – celebrating the dead king's birthday. Businesses and schools were already supposed to be closed, and I think it was lucky. It allowed for more time to get over the shock and readjust.
On Monday the way to school was normal, but once I got there I saw a more red kafiyyas than ever before. Normally some men will wear them around their necks or on their heads, but after the bombings almost everyone was wearing them, including women. Classes ended early, so we could participate in a school-wide demonstration. We went as a group from the language center, and some international students carried signs in Arabic, with the regular message – 'Jordan University's Language Students Are Against Terror'. There were lots of flags and pictures of the King on sticks. People singing of slogans with Ya'allah, and lots of clapping. Overall, I was very impressed with how positive it all was. It wasn't about blame. There was no mention of Bush or the West or Israel. [Granted I am not fluent in Arabic and I did not understand all the speakers, I am getting good at picking out the words 'israel', 'palestine', 'america', occupation', 'death'.] Instead the message was 'Jordan is strong, Jordan is number one' and 'long live the king'. There was nothing burning and no pushing – people were proud to be together.
There are a bunch of Iraqis who work/hang out at a store where I make international phone calls. A couple of days after the bombings I expected them to be nervous or upset that people were blaming them, but they were their fun, chipper selves.
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It's been a number of weeks now, and things are relatively back to normal. Cafes are full of people on the weekends; people are again eating in the international restaurants in big-chain hotels. The only difference is extra security; metal detectors you need to walk through and men with wands. In the days immediately following there was an obvious military presence, with tanks at major intersections and soldiers with big guns hanging out on street corners. I would flinch whenever I heard sirens, but now I have gotten over it. I live very close to the Iraqi and Indian Embassies, and some other important places. There used to be guards just in front of those buildings, but now there are more soldiers and police cars canvassing the area. After spending last year in Israel I have become used to opening my bag for inspections and seeing people carry big guns - maybe a little too comfortable.
One month later, and the flags are still hanging. Pictures of the King are still out, but taxis are no longer fully covered in patriotic pride. People are still wearing red kafiyyas, but now it is just men. There is so much news happening around the world, conversations have moved from what happened here to the elections in Iraq, recent violence in Palestine, and secret CIA flights in Europe.
And so life continues. I have become very comfortable in my apartment, and my neighborhood is great. I have a ways to go with my Arabic, but I am definitely improving. I am getting much better at small talk with locals, and now much of the time when I smile and nod I actually know what's going on! I plan to stay and continue studying at Jordan University during the spring semester. I am actively seeking employment here in the water/environment/international development fields, so I may end up staying even longer. I don't really have anything else to do. Anything could happen. As usual I am having adventures - meeting interesting people and having new experiences.
Visitors are most welcome – I have an extra bedroom.
Hope all is well with you and yours wherever you are, whatever you are doing.
Ma'a salaama from the HK of J.
-Tova
