Blog thoughts from the last few weeks:
One thing that is nice in this country - when I introduce myself to new people, they always get my name on the first try. Its refreshing. With Arabs I sometimes explain that it is like “Shana Tova” because they expect my name to be Toba. Then I am out-ed.
Its confusing to walk down Ben Yehuda street, in the heart of West Jerusalem, wearing a skirt, looking religious, listening to Amer Diab and walking towards the East Side. Likewise, its confusing walking in East Jerusalem, wearing a skirt and looking all religious, listening to Shlomo Arzi.
At public appearances, why does the US consul have 2 men with ear-pieces in the room to walk him up and down to the stage and scan the room, while the European Community’s representative has none?
Mid-March, and the weather is hot, Hot, HOT. Tonight begins purim – the Jewish answer to Halloween. But people have been getting dressed up for days. Little girls have been dressed as princesses all week. Tonight is an excuse for the parents to start drinking.
Mid-March, and I’m still unemployed. I need to start keeping better track of my spending and curtail my food and recreation budget. And/or learn how to make a budget, and stick to it. I need to spend more time at people’s houses and less going out, but I still need to meet new people. I have a few applications to complete – it would help if I had my computer back. 3-Fucking-Weeks! I went for an interview at the call center. Not as bad as I expected. They pay is less than $10/hr, but I have no choice.
Why won’t the World Bank make a decision already?!
I went to Hebron. Another visit, another baby. I hadn’t been there since New Years. I need to try to make it once a month, or once every-other month. They need the distraction, but I don’t want them spending money on me. Next time I should bring chickens for Maqloubeh.
What a difference a couple of days can make! New ideas. New mind-sets. New people. New opportunities. And how quickly it can call go away again...
Friday, March 28, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
West Side
I am spending lots of time in the West, the Jewish section of Jerusalem. I have been defending Israel left and right, attending birthday parties where all the food is kosher and men wear Kippot, and going to the movies. Now that I have my membership and an empty apartment, I keep going to movies. For whatever reason, I keep seeing war movies - guns, explosions, death. It feels strange to watch in a culture that is so dominated by war and violence. I keep waiting for someone to run out crying, due to flashbacks.
Now I am sitting in a kosher Bagel restaurant, in a very American area. I don't know why I came here. I am half in the mood to run into people, half hiding. I am trying to explore different parts of this city, and I don't want to hide from certain neighborhoods anymore. Its not worth it. It is strange to be a place where you can have a "Bagel with a shmear". There's a large group of religious Americans sitting together, enjoying a birthday dinner of salads, pasta, and bagel sandwiches. There is a large boisterous man next to me telling inappropriate jokes, singing to himself, and playing fantasy computer games. There is a young couple with a young child who won't shut up, but for whatever reason they won't leave. At least I have gotten this out of my system, and I don't need to come to this area for a long, long time.
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My birthday was last week. Lots of people came to help me celebrate, at a Tapas bar in West Jerusalem. It was amazing to have so many people from different places together - Jews, Christians, Muslims, and atheists. Israeli, Palestinian, American, Italian, Canadian, British. One friend I've known since I was 5, others from the Arava, some people I have just met in the last couple of weeks, and a friend who I first met randomly at a party in Jordan 3.5 years ago. The a large crew of friends of a friend tromped in, sang Happy Birthday in Hebrew, then left. At first the mingling wasn't so smooth, but by the end some numbers were exchanged. A success.
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Friday was a little nutsy: I went on an alternative archeology tour of the City of David and Silwan. Did some quick food-shopping errands. Met up for cocktails with a friend and got some closure (and my French coffee press!). Then Friday night dinner with old family friends and a combo of random young people. Then out until 3am with a bunch of Israeli Arabs, drinking and smoking, getting stared at for using Arabic in public and feeling funny for still wearing my shabbat clothes at a dance bar.
All in all, an interesting night. More things happened over the weekend, but I have to get out of this neighborhood. I need to learn to live life NOW instead of just reflecting on what was and over thinking what could be. But I still need a job...
Now I am sitting in a kosher Bagel restaurant, in a very American area. I don't know why I came here. I am half in the mood to run into people, half hiding. I am trying to explore different parts of this city, and I don't want to hide from certain neighborhoods anymore. Its not worth it. It is strange to be a place where you can have a "Bagel with a shmear". There's a large group of religious Americans sitting together, enjoying a birthday dinner of salads, pasta, and bagel sandwiches. There is a large boisterous man next to me telling inappropriate jokes, singing to himself, and playing fantasy computer games. There is a young couple with a young child who won't shut up, but for whatever reason they won't leave. At least I have gotten this out of my system, and I don't need to come to this area for a long, long time.
---
My birthday was last week. Lots of people came to help me celebrate, at a Tapas bar in West Jerusalem. It was amazing to have so many people from different places together - Jews, Christians, Muslims, and atheists. Israeli, Palestinian, American, Italian, Canadian, British. One friend I've known since I was 5, others from the Arava, some people I have just met in the last couple of weeks, and a friend who I first met randomly at a party in Jordan 3.5 years ago. The a large crew of friends of a friend tromped in, sang Happy Birthday in Hebrew, then left. At first the mingling wasn't so smooth, but by the end some numbers were exchanged. A success.
---
Friday was a little nutsy: I went on an alternative archeology tour of the City of David and Silwan. Did some quick food-shopping errands. Met up for cocktails with a friend and got some closure (and my French coffee press!). Then Friday night dinner with old family friends and a combo of random young people. Then out until 3am with a bunch of Israeli Arabs, drinking and smoking, getting stared at for using Arabic in public and feeling funny for still wearing my shabbat clothes at a dance bar.
All in all, an interesting night. More things happened over the weekend, but I have to get out of this neighborhood. I need to learn to live life NOW instead of just reflecting on what was and over thinking what could be. But I still need a job...
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Reality Bites
The workshop is over. A month and a half of my life - sleepless nights, sudden trips to Ramallah, countless stops at the printer's to print budgets and schedules and CVs, but now it is done. It ended in an unexciting way - sitting at the border in Eilat. As usual my Syrian stamps caused me problems, and I had to sit and wait at the border for an hour, without explanation. My boss and participants were eager to get home, so they ditched me. Luckily my co-worker stayed and escorted me to Eilat where I got a bus to Tel Aviv, then a sherut to Jerusalem. Once I got the visa it took me over 7 hours to get home. I should've just rented a car and charged the workshop, but because I was in charge of the budget I knew there wasn't much spare money for it. But it' done. And after nearly a week of terse emails to America I have MOST of my salary in my bank account, and now just need a few hundred shekels and a couple JD to reimburse me for the expenses I paid out of pocket. Time to take a break from the Arava for a while...
Being back in Jerusalem is bittersweet. I must have started to idealize it, during the quiet nights on the Kibbutz. I should be grateful for the handful of people I DO have and to know a number of coffee shops where I can hang out with laptop and family friends where I can invite myself over for Shabbat - I need to remember to do that today.
One way to kill time is to see movies. I finally bought a membership to the cinematheque, which means I will be staying in Jerusalem for a few more months. Just because I can I need to see lots of movies. The other night I went to see a movie about outsourcing to India. It wasn't very good, but not so bad that I wanted to walk out. And I am trying to learn not to leave in the middle of cultural activities - I got pretty bad in London. I wanted to take a bus home since I had walked 30 mins there, but the street going towards the German colony was blocked with a police van and no one was walking through. I saw a bus stopped at a weird angle, heard some police yelling through a loud speaker, and then a loud "boom". There was an attack in Dimona a couple days ago, and people have been talking about the escapees from Gaza and how it's just a matter of time until something happens here. But this is the city of peace. And I am invincible. I walked home as quickly as I could and looked at Haaretz/JPost/Debka, but no news of a bombing. Maybe it was just practice or an unidentified left bag. Whatever it was I am back on edge again, and not very excited about it.
So there are good days and there are bad days. I need to work on getting Health Insurance and opening a bank account. And this whole job thing - go Japanese! But in between I should spend some quality time in Hebron, pick up some stuff from the boy's house in Haifa, read a book at the Austrian Hospice, take a road trip, and see my old Arabic tutor. And try to make some new friends, without a job or school to ease the transition. This could be interesting...
Being back in Jerusalem is bittersweet. I must have started to idealize it, during the quiet nights on the Kibbutz. I should be grateful for the handful of people I DO have and to know a number of coffee shops where I can hang out with laptop and family friends where I can invite myself over for Shabbat - I need to remember to do that today.
One way to kill time is to see movies. I finally bought a membership to the cinematheque, which means I will be staying in Jerusalem for a few more months. Just because I can I need to see lots of movies. The other night I went to see a movie about outsourcing to India. It wasn't very good, but not so bad that I wanted to walk out. And I am trying to learn not to leave in the middle of cultural activities - I got pretty bad in London. I wanted to take a bus home since I had walked 30 mins there, but the street going towards the German colony was blocked with a police van and no one was walking through. I saw a bus stopped at a weird angle, heard some police yelling through a loud speaker, and then a loud "boom". There was an attack in Dimona a couple days ago, and people have been talking about the escapees from Gaza and how it's just a matter of time until something happens here. But this is the city of peace. And I am invincible. I walked home as quickly as I could and looked at Haaretz/JPost/Debka, but no news of a bombing. Maybe it was just practice or an unidentified left bag. Whatever it was I am back on edge again, and not very excited about it.
So there are good days and there are bad days. I need to work on getting Health Insurance and opening a bank account. And this whole job thing - go Japanese! But in between I should spend some quality time in Hebron, pick up some stuff from the boy's house in Haifa, read a book at the Austrian Hospice, take a road trip, and see my old Arabic tutor. And try to make some new friends, without a job or school to ease the transition. This could be interesting...
Monday, January 07, 2008
Another Year
It’s already 2008. How did that happen? I was too distracted watching wedding videos in Hebron. She was 16 and he was 22. At least I know they are no longer saving him for me. He is now the proud father of a beautiful little girl. When I saw her in the summer she was an infant. Now she is crawling and starting to walk. It’s amazing how quickly the kids grow and change. When I visited in the fall of 2004 D was just a few weeks old. Now three and a half years later, we can talk about animals and colors and vegetables – all in Arabic.
My sister came to visit. Went to Bethlehem, Ramallah, and Hebron, and quality time in East and West Jerusalem. I attended a Jewish wedding and a Muslim wedding, but skipped the Christian one. Too much for one week. I danced and drank and laughed and reconnected with old friends, and now I’m sick.
This workshop is taking over life, and there still aren’t enough Palestinians. Now it’s getting personal. I need it to be successful, but I also need a job when it’s done. 21 days – eek. Time to learn the art of balance.
Bush is coming to visit. The streets are lined by American and Israeli flags. Instead of feeling patriotic, the two flags together make me feel a little uneasy. The same way I feel when I see such a combination gracing a man’s chest on a lapel pin. Not so attractive. The city is going to be in lock-down mode. Businesses are closing, doctor’s offices are canceling appointments, and schools are shutting down for 2 days. I am supposed to have a meeting in Ramallah on Thursday – looks like I might have to reschedule.
Finally bought stickers with Arabic and Hebrew on my keyboard. I can’t wait! Except it seems some of the Arabic letters a wrong. Zift.
Graduation is next week. I won’t make it.
My sister came to visit. Went to Bethlehem, Ramallah, and Hebron, and quality time in East and West Jerusalem. I attended a Jewish wedding and a Muslim wedding, but skipped the Christian one. Too much for one week. I danced and drank and laughed and reconnected with old friends, and now I’m sick.
This workshop is taking over life, and there still aren’t enough Palestinians. Now it’s getting personal. I need it to be successful, but I also need a job when it’s done. 21 days – eek. Time to learn the art of balance.
Bush is coming to visit. The streets are lined by American and Israeli flags. Instead of feeling patriotic, the two flags together make me feel a little uneasy. The same way I feel when I see such a combination gracing a man’s chest on a lapel pin. Not so attractive. The city is going to be in lock-down mode. Businesses are closing, doctor’s offices are canceling appointments, and schools are shutting down for 2 days. I am supposed to have a meeting in Ramallah on Thursday – looks like I might have to reschedule.
Finally bought stickers with Arabic and Hebrew on my keyboard. I can’t wait! Except it seems some of the Arabic letters a wrong. Zift.
Graduation is next week. I won’t make it.
